I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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