My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
