So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
