Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
In America we eat man semen.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
