i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
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This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
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You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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