So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Randomize
