We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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