He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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