i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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