It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize