the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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