you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
27 Times The Kardashian-Jenner Clan Absolutely Slayed at NYFW
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
19 Doctors Confess The Most Difficult Situation They’ve Ever Had To Face
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP