I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I believe in your delicious
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
