none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
