I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I feel like abortions should bother me more
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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