I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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