i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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