remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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