im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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