have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
