i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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