So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Randomize
