"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
