After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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