in pain and im wearing pink underwear
i dont own pink underwear
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things