In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
