dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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