Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
