Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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