I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
