drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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