so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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