I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
