I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize