told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Life is so much better after having sex.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
