Ambien. No doubt about it.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
