I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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