It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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