I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize