For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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