when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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