Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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