he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
