Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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