operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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