i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
