at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Randomize
