Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize