your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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