yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
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