So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Randomize